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BY'JULIA- ELLSWORTH •FORD- 
RHYMES > BY.WnTER'BYyVA/ER. 
•ILLU$tf^AT{DNS-BY'ARTHUR'RACKHAM 



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COPYRIGHT DEPOSIK 



SNICKERTY NICK 




DANCE OF SPRING 



SNICkERTY NICK 



BY 



JULIA ELLSWORTH FORD 

Rhymes by 
Witter Bynner 

Illustrations by 
Arthur Rackham 




New York 

MOFFAT, YARD & CO. 
1919 



,^A\ 



COPYRIGHT, 1919, 

BY 

MOFFAT, YARD & CO. 



The acting rights are reserved by the author. 

ijbu 15 1319 
':^CI.A5 59 53 



5 



FOR THE DELIGHTFUL CHILD SPIRIT 
OF THE RHYMES OF 

WITTER BYNNER 

I AM DEEPLY GRATEFUL 

AND THAT PART OF THE PLAY WHICH IS MINE 

I DEDICATE TO HIM 

WITH SINCERE APPRECIATION 



BY THE SAME AUTHOR 

PICTURES by GEORGE FREDERICK 
WATTS. 23 ill jstrations. Introduction 
by Author and Thomas W. Lamont. 4I0, 
$3-50. 

KING SOLOMON AND THE FAIR 
SHUL.\MITE with 7 photogravure illus- 
trations, izmo, $1.^0. 

"A. E." A Note op Appreciation, with 
portrait and facsimile. i2mo, $1.00. 

SIMEON SOLOMON. An .Appreciation, 
with 22 illustrations. 410, $1.50. 

THE MIST. A Play IN One .\CT. Produced 
in London at The Little Theatre November, 
1913- 

IM.AGIN.A. A Fanciful T.\le for Chil- 
dren \ND Grown-ups. With colored illus- 
trationj by .Arthur Rackham and draw- 
inj'S by LAtrREN I'oRD. $2.00 



MOFFAT. YARD & CO. 



FOREWORD 

The idea of the Selfish Giant in this play has been 
taken from the story of Oscar Wilde's Selfish^ Giant. 
Spring would not come to his garden because he would 
not let the children play in it. It was always winter 
there. 

One morning he woke up hearing the music of 
a linnet singing in his garden. He jumped out of 
bed and saw a most wonderful sight, "flowers were 
looking up through the green grass and laughing," and 
in every tree was a little child; but one little boy was too 
tiny to climb the tree and the Giant's heart melted and 
he helped the little child into the tree. The little 
child kissed him and forever after the children played 
in the Giant's garden, because his heart had softened 
through love of the little child. 

The children never saw the child again. But one day 
he came to the Giant, who saw on the palms of the 
child's hands " the prints of two nails and the prints 
of two nails were on the little feet." 

vii 



FOREWORD 

The little child had come to take the Giant to play in 
his garden, "which is Paradise." 

My indebtedness to this story is the character of the 
Selfish Giant. The little play of Snickerty Nick is not 
a dramatization of The Selfish Giant. The character 
of Snickerty Nick is an original character and the 
play centers around him. The little boy is only a loving 
and beloved child, and Spring and Winter are per- 
sonified by faeries and gnomes. 

To Arthur Rackham I tender my most sincere thanks 
whose magic touch, as in Peter Pan, Grimtn's Faery 
Tales and Undine, making real all faeries and gnomes, 
endears all child life to grown-ups as well as to children. 

Julia Ellsworth Ford. 



viu 



CHARACTERS 
THE GIANT baron bill-arron 

BOMBERRUM 

THE DWARF snickerty nick 

THE LITTLE BOY 

THE CHILDREN 

WINTER 

SPRING 

WINTER'S GNOMES— SNOW 

HAIL 
FROST 

NORTHWIND 
CHILBLAINS 

SPRING'S FAERIES— COWSLIP 

BUTTERCUP 
SWEET WILLIAM 
DANDEUON 
BLUE BELL 
BUMBLE BEE 
RAGGED SAILOR 

The children may choose their names from 
Mother Goose or any they may fancy. 

9 



A little hoy came laughing and turned icicles 
into flowers and won a kingdom ivith love. 



SCENE I 



SNICKERTY NICK 



Scene I. — A flower garden covered with frost 
and snow. Here and there bushes covered 
with snow — large enough to hide children. 
On the right a tower with window and door. 
In the middle back a wall with a barred 
gate, through which flowers are seen bloom- 
ing outside. On the step of the tower is 
seen the Dwarf. He has a kind quaint face. 
He is painting an enormous sign. 



TRESPASSERS 

WILL BE 

ET 



DWARF 

A Giant owns this garden 

Where the children want to play, 

15 



SNICKERTY NICK 

But the Giant hates the children 

And chases them away; 
And there can't be any summer here, 

The sun will never stay, 
For where no children ever come, 

It's winter every day. 

Now I'm the Giant's servant 

And I never have my way : 
For I have to tell the children 

That they mustn't come and play. 
For I wouldn't want them eaten up 

And so I have to say, 
It's not my grass, you can't come in, 

You've got to go away. 

[Placifjg the paint brush in the paint can^ 

Pretty good work, Nicky. One more touch 
and it will be finished. 

[fFhile Snickerty Nick is eyeing his work, a 

small boy creeps through the hedge, tip- 

i6 




He has a quaint kind face 



SNICKERTY NICK 

toes up behind Nicky and takes his paint 
brush away. Nicky reaches for it, not find- 
ing it, looks puzzled, hunts for it and dis- 
covers the little boy.^ 

LITTLE BOY 

{Holding up the paint brush, laughing"] 

Hello, Nicky! What will you give me for 
this? 

DWARF 

A spanking. 

LITTLE BOY 

O no, you couldn't! 

DWARF 

Couldn't I? Why couldn't I, I'd like to 
know? 

LITTLE BOY 

{Smiling and giving the Dwarf the brush] 
You don't look like a spanker, Nicky. 

17 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

You're right. I'm more spanked against than 
spanking. The Giant takes care of that. See 
what he made me do for him. 

[Pointing to the sign.^ 

LITTLE BOY 

What does it say, Nicky? 

DWARF 

Trespassers will be et. 

LITTLE BOY 

What's trespassers? 

DWARF 

You're one. 

And you'd better look spry! — 

If the Giant comes by 

And you're here yet — 

Why, you'll be et. 
i8 




k^^ 




<4^^^Cfcl,»..ll 




More spanked against than spanking 



SNICKERTY NICK 

It's a bit cannibalistic, I must say. But that 
isn't my doings, you know. 

LITTLE BOY 

I'm not afraid of him. 
\_He goes toward the Giant's door and is about 
to knock.^ 

DWARF 

[Alarmed] 
Don't knock on that door! 

LITTLE BOY 

I want to ask the Giant why we can't play in 
his garden. The gardens that we can't get into 
are the ones we like the best, and we like this 
garden better than any other garden. 

DWARF 

When the Giant goes away I'll let you in. 
I'm afraid you'll be et up if you stay here. 

19 



SNICKERTY NICK 

I 

LITTLE BOY 

Fm not afraid. 

DWARF 

Don't you see that sign? Out with you ! 
\_Dwarf chases the Boy out of the garden. He 
stumbles over his easle and the sign falls 
down with a loud noise. As Snickerty Nick 
opens the gate the Giant sticks his head out 
of the door. The Giant is a little deaf and 
often holds his hand to his ear.^ 

GIANT 

Hello, Snickerty Nick! What's all this 
racket? 

[He catches sight of the sign, comes out, grabs 
the brush from the Dwarf's hand and adds 
another T and roars,'\ 

E-T-T — E double T — ETT. Don't you 

know how to spell ETT? 

20 




The Giant sticks his head out of the door 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

I do. 

GIANT 

You don't. 

DWARF 

[Making a bow^ 

I beg to differ with you, Baron Bill-Arron 
Bomberrum, I have been the amanuensis of 
the Marquise of Magog for ninety-nine years. 

GIANT 

What's an amanuensis? 

DWARF 

An amanuensis is a man who follows you 
around and writes down everything you say. 

GIANT 

What's that to do with ett? 

21 



SNICKERTY NICK 

DWARF 
What has that to do with ett? 
The most exquisite woman I ever met, 
Etta by name, a love, a pet, 
Here's what she had to do with ett — 
She et her egg with etiquette. 
But once her lovely sleeve got wet 
And it dripped when she danced the minuet 
And left a spot on the green carpet. 
And I made a note of her great regret 
In this little green- book which I carry yet. 

GIANT 

Stop your nonsense, talk sense. 

DWARF 

Who talks sense anyway? 
[Counting his buttons^ 

Richman? Poorman? Beggarman? Thief? 
Doctor? Lawyer? Merchant? Chief? None 
of them talk sense. 

22 



SNICKERTY NICK 
GIANT 

You irritate me. I'm going to kick you. 

DWARF 

[Consulting the green book'\ 

You've already kicked me 9,995 times. When 
you've kicked me 10,000 times, according 
to your solemn promise as a giant, the kingdom 
will be mine. Don't say I didn't warn you. Five 
more! 

GIANT 

By Beelzebub, I must kick you. 
[He kicks the Dwarf .^ 

DWARF 

[Taking his score book out of his pocket^ 

Got it in my score book — got it in — 9,996 

kicks. 

[Dusts his pants, where the Giant has kicked 

23 



SNICKERTY NICK 

him, with a whisk broom hanging on his 
coat.'\ 

GIANT 

Here's another. 
[Giant kicks Dwarf again.^ 

DWARF 

9,997 kicks ! Only three more ! 
[The Dwarf chuckling, again takes the whisk 
broom and dusts his pants J\ 

GIANT 

Hang the sign on the gate, you snickerty 
snicker! What were you made for? 

DWARF 

Being, not doing, your Highness. 

GIANT 

Well, I was made for doing. I am faring away 
early to-morrow morning before you'll be up. 

24 



SNICKERTY NICK 

sleepy head, to see the great Cornish Ogre to 
ask him why it's always winter in my garden. 
It's spring now and I want flowers in my gar- 
den and I don't understand why they won't grow. 
They bloom everywhere except here. I am the 
great giant, Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum. And 
I will have flowers. Look around and see if you 
can find me even one bud. 
[They both lookJ] 

DWARF 

I can't find one. I like my friend Mary's gar- 
den better than yours, although I don't care for 
cockle shells and silver bells. Personally, I pre- 
fer the pretty maids all in a row. 

GIANT 

Listen! I shall be gone seven years. Seven 
is a lucky number. I shall stay only seven years 
because my conversation is limited. 

25 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

{^Scratching his forehead^ 
It's the limit! 

GIANT 

{With his hand to his ear^ 
What? 

DWARF 

I say seven years is the limit. 
{The clock in the tower strikes one.] 

GIANT 

What's that? 

DWARF 

Oh, that's Dickery Dock. He is a perfect 

nuisance. I wish he would let that old clock 

alone. Personally I dislike him. 

{Just as the Giant starts to go out of the gate, the 

Dwarf puts his hat on the ground in front 

of the Giant.'l 

26 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

Kick it quick ! 
[To the audience, behind his hand] 
There's a brick in it! 

[The Giant starts to kick the Dwarf again.] 

DWARF 

[Standing- still] 
Go on, kick me — 999 



[The Giant stops his foot in time, shakes his stick 
at him.] 

GIANT 

Not this time! 

DWARF 

Nick of time, for all time belongs to Snickerty 
Nick. No time like the present. 

[Takes of} his hat and bows, then runs swiftly 

around in a circle.] 

27 



SNICKERTY NICK 
GIANT 
What are you doing? 

DWARF 

Killing time. I learned to do that when I was 
the amanuensis of the Marquise of Magog, 

GIANT 

Hang up the sign and lock the gate. Don't 
let anyone in. Don't let the children play in my 
garden. My own garden is my own garden and 
I will allow nobody to play in it but myself. Do 
you hear? 

DWARF 

Yes, your Stoutness, I hear. Hearing may be 

better than seeing — sometimes — it depends on 

what you look at. Personally I prefer seeing, 

even when 

28 



SNICKERTY NICK 
GIANT 

Here, Snickerty Nick, pull off my boots. 1 
am going to bed. 

[Dwarf pulls off one boot.'\ 

DWARF 

[^Looking at it quizzically^ 

It has always been a puzzle to me, how that 
old woman lived in the shoe with so many chil- 
dren. Very insanitary. 

\^As he pulls off the other boot, the Giant kicks 
him. He rolls over, then gets up and makes 
the entry in his score book.^ 
9,999! One more kick and the kingdom's 
mine. Hurrah! 

GIANT 

I am going to bed now. See that there is no 
noise around here. 

[Giant puts on his night-cap and goes in.} 

29 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

My brain may be little, 
My brain may be thick, 
But why should people 
With kingdoms — kick? 

My brain may be mighty. 
My brain may be deep. 
But dreams are a kingdom — 
I'm going to sleep. 

l^He curls up on the steps and goes to sleep. The 

stage darkens. It is night.^ 
\_W inter, wrapped in silver, steals in through the 

gate, treads softly around the flower beds, 

in and out among the bushes and stands in 

the middle.^ 

WINTER 

[Calling softly] 
Northwind ! Northwind I 

30 




Liy-Sl^^ 



DANCE OF WINTER AND GNOMES 



SNICKERTY NICK 

[Northwind dashes in clothed in purple, purple 
wings floating behind her.^ 

WINTER 

Blow your horn! Call our friends! This is 
a delightful spot. We must invite Snow, Hail, 
Frost, and Chilblains and live here all the year 
round. 

NORTHWIND 

Oo-00-OO-ooh! 
[Snow enters all in white carrying a basket filled 
with snowballs, and with snow to sprinkle 
on the bushes. Hail, in grey, hops over one 
of the bushes and as he does so hailstones 
are heard. Frost, in silver, waves a silver 
scarf over the flowers. Chilblains, in blue, 
comically carries an enormous bottle of 
camphor.^ 

WINTER 

Let's dance. 

31 



SNICKERTY NICK 
WINTER AND GNOMES 

[As they dance^ 

We'll make you say, Ooh! and we'll make you 
say, Ow ! 
But it's cold, cold, cold! 
We've a wonderful game for those that know 
how — 
You don't, for you've never been told. 
We plant little icicles neatly in rows, 
So small you can't see them, then each of us goes 
And picks one and tickles the end of your nose. 
Another one prickles the tips of your toes 
And you run saying, Ooh ! and you run saying, 
Ow! 
But it's cold, cold, cold ! 

WINTER 

Northwind, lock the selfish Giant in. 

\_N ortJnvind locks the Giant's door.'\ 

32 



SNICKERTY NICK 

DWARF 
[PFaking upl 

Dear me! What has happened! I'm a bit 
chilly on the projecting points, 
[Dwarf rubs his ears and toes.^ 

GIANT 

[Poking his head out of the window with his 
night-cap on aud roaring^ 

Get out of my garden. Unlock my door, you 
winter villains. You and your friends have 
killed all my flowers and the blossoms on my 
apple trees and there will be no golden fruit in 
the autumn. If I catch you I will kill you and 
gobble you all up. 

ALL 
[Mocking him] 

Fee, fi, fo, fum! 
Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum! 
33 



SNICKERTY NICK 
CHILBLAINS 

Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum, It'll be nip 
and tuck between us two. Try to tuck me away 
and I'll nip your nose. 

GIANT 

I will turn you into frogs and snakes. 

WINTER 

\^Calling'\ 

Snow, Hail, Frost, Northwind, Chilblains, 
come! 

[^Snow throws snowballs at the Giant. Hail 
throws stones and Northwind blows on his 
horn.^ 

GIANT 

Go away or I will kill you and eat you up, and 
a poor cold porridge you'll make. 

34 




Snow throws snowballs at the Giant 



SNICKERTY NICK 

ALL 

\_Mocking and clapping their hands with the 
rhyme^ 

Pease porridge hot, 
Pease porridge cold, 
Pease porridge in the pot, 
The Giant's growing old! 

CHILBLAINS 

Give him the cold shoulder. 

[_JV inter and gnomes turn left shoulder toward 
him.] 

Ha ! Ha ! Look at your nose now ! 

DWARF 

You are disturbing my rest with that beastly 
noise. Go away, I want to sleep. 

GIANT 

Get out of my garden. Go to the North Pole, 
there's where you belong. I wish you would go 

35 



SNICKERTY NICK 

there and never come back again. I want 
flowers in my garden. 

WINTER 

This is nearer and more convenient. Besides 
we don't like the Esquimos, they are too fat. 

DWARF 

You ought to know my friend Jack Sprat. He 

eats no fat, but his wife 

[Rolls his eyesJ\ 

Personally I dislike fat women. 

GIANT 

Snickerty Nick, unlock the door. 

ALL 

[Restraining the Dwarf with nips^ 

Ha, ha, Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum. 
Come out if you can. Just walk out, your High- 
ness. 

36 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

Walking is such good exercise. Much better 
than taking a bath. Bathing is such lonely work, 
you know. 

GIANT 

Snickerty Nick, if you will unlock the door, 
I'll give you the last kick. Then the kingdom 
will be yours. 

CHILBLAINS 

[Unlocking- the door] 

I've unlocked the door. Come out, come out, 
kick me, and give me the kingdom. 

GIANT 

[Tramping out furious and holding his stick 
high] 
This is what I'll give you ! 
[ They run. Giant chases them. They disappear 
behind the bushes. Chilblains steals up be- 
hind and touches the Dwarf.] 

37 



SNICKERTY NICK 

DWARF 
[Howls.^ 

My ! My ! What has happened to my toes? 
[Sits on the ground and rubs them.^ 

Something has happened to my feet, one more 
thing to add to my woes. If I can't walk and 
have to use crutches, and the Giant kicks me 
any more, I'll fall down and break my head, and 
lose my crown. Personally I prefer walking. 
[Chilblains touches the Giant's nose.'\ 

GIANT 

[His nose is quite white.] 

My ! My ! What has happened to my nose? 
[Giant steps back and stumbles over the Dwarf 
and starts to kick him but stops.~\ 
No, Nicky, I won't kick you any more for the 
present; I know just when to stop. 
[Teeth chattering'] 

I have had enough of this old garden. I won't 

38 




The great Cornish Ogre 




THE LITTLE BOY 



SNICKERTY NICK 

Stay here any longer. I am getting old and 
lonely. I am going away to see the Cornish 
Ogre, to see if he has flowers in his garden. 

DWARF 

Good-bye! Be good! Good for nothing! 

GIANT 



What? 


DWARF 








Nothing. 


GIANT 








Don't forget to 
[Exit Giant. 
Little Gnomes 
bushes.] 


hang up the 
pop their 


; sign. 
heads 


above 


the 



GNOMES 

Snickerty Nick, what will you give us when 
you get the kingdom? 

39 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

I'll give you a whistle and then you can 
whistle for it. 

NORTHWIND 

I am your sister; what will you do for me? 

DWARF 

I'll call you Una and give you a dandelion to 
roar at you. 

FROST 

I am your brother; what will you give me? 

DWARF 

I will give you the mint of my kingdom — a 
peppermint. 

SNOW 

I am your sweetheart; what will you give me? 

DWARF 

A trip to the moon. 

40 



SNICKERTY NICK 

SNOW 
Ever been to the Moon, Nicky? 

DWARF 

I once thought of going to the moon but I 
was prevented by circumstances over which I 
had no control. 

HAIL 

I am your great-uncle ; what will you give me? 

DWARF 

I'll give you a horse and then you'll have a 
hobby. 

CHILBLAINS 

I am your granny; what will you give me? 

DWARF 

A horn and then you'll have plenty. 
I am very busy. Go away. I am going to 
sleep for seven years. Ah! Early to bed and 

41 



SNICKERTY NICK 

early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and 
wise. Personally I prefer to sleep. 
[Hangs the sign upside down, locks the gate 
and gets into the wheel-barrow.^ 
Hurrah for a rest! I will snooze and snooze 
for seven years. 
[Goes to sleep.li 

NORTHWIND 

Sandman, Sandman! 
[The Sandman appears.] 

GNOMES 

[Quickly picking up the sand from under the 

snow'\ 

Sandman, Sandman, 

Take it in your hand, man ! 

See the Dwarf has closed his eyes, 

Come and give him a surprise. 

Look, his mouth is open wide — 

Pour your handful right inside, 
42 




The Sandman watches smiling 



SNICKERTY NICK 

Fill it up with sand, man! 
Listen, listen — hear it slide. 
Hear it bumping down inside, 
Thank you, Mr. Sandman. 

\_The Sandman watches smiling while the 
Gnomes have a revel of mirth over the 
Dwarf's snoring. They conclude with a 
Snore Dance, circling hand in hand around 
the Dwarf and at regular intervals squatting 
as they snore with the beat of the music. 
Presently they run behind the trees. The 
snores die away with the snore music. The 
stage darkens.^ 



43 



SCENE II 



Scene II. — Nearly seven years have passed. 
Spring has taken possession of the garden 
and flowers are blooming everywhere. 
Spring, dressed in yellow, appears suddenly 
out of the bush; then several little figures 
dressed in yellow — or other colours — ap- 
pear. They dance in front of the flower 
beds and scatter flowers. 

SPRING 
{^Dances and sings^ 

I am little mischief Spring 
Getting into everything I 

Toorily, oorily, oo. 
And when I lift my finger ring 

Made of drops of dew, 
All the little robins sing, 
And the babies go, Goo, Goo. 
47 



SNICKERTY NICK 

Cowslip, wake the Dwarf. He has slept 
nearly seven years. 

[Cowslip runs to wake the Dwarf, slips and 
falls.] 

SPRING 

Sweet William, pick her up. She is always 
slipping! Always slipping! 
[Cowslip slips and falls many times. Sweet 
William always picks her up.] 

SPRING 

Buttercup, see if you can wake the Dwarf. 

BUTTERCUP 

[Picking a buttercup from her dress, tickles 
the Dwarf's nose. The Dwarf makes faces. 
Buttercup holds the buttercup under the 
Dwarf's chin.] 

Do you like butter-butter-butter? 

48 



SNICKERTY NICK 

DWARF 
\_In a sleepy voiced 

Butter? Butter is no good without bread. 
[He opens his eyes for a moment, then shuts 
them again.'] 

BUTTERCUP 

[Shaking him] 
He doesn't like butter ! I can't wake him. 

SPRING 

Ragged Sailor, try what you can do. 
[Ragged Sailor with his shirt sticking out tugs 
at the Dwarf.] 

RAGGED SAILOR 

Ahoy, Nicky! Time you pulled up anchor. 
Here, shift to Port. 
[Rolling him over on his side.] 

DWARF 

[Sitting up] 

49 



SNICKERTY NICK 

Hello, Dicky Dicky Doubt, with your shirt- 
tail out! 

\_They all laiigh.'\ 
\^Nicky rubs his eyes and falls asleep again.^ 

RAGGED SAILOR 

There's no moving him. He's aground, he is. 
[Sailor fashion he dances a few stepsi\ 

SPRING 

Sweet William, you try. 
\Sweet William takes the paints that the Dwarf 
has used for the sign and paints a dot of red 
on his forehead, his cheeks and then the end 
of his nose until he is a droll sight.^ 

SWEET WILLIAM 

See what a funny face he has. He won't know 

himself when he wakes up. 

[Shaking hint] 

Wake up ! Wake up ! I can't wake him. 

SO 



SNICKERTY NICK 
BLUE BELL 

Let me try. I will tickle him. 
Tickely, tickely, on the knee, 
If you laugh, you don't love me. 
[She tickles him on the nose and on the knee. 
He sits up suddenly for a moment, rubs his 
nose and makes funny faces. Finally he 
falls back asleep.] 
It's no use, he doesn't love me and he won't 
wake up. 

[The Dwarf snickers in his sleep.] 

BUMBLE BEE 

[In a low buzzing voice.] 

I can wake him. I'll stick my itchy needle 
in, in, in. 

[The Dwarf scratches first in one place, then in 
another, gives a kick and curls up asleep 
again.] 

51 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DANDELION 

I'll play a trick on him, I'll put his hair in curl 
papers. 
[To the audience^ 

Do you like curly hair, boys? 
[Putting his front locks in curl papers] 

Look at Sleeping Beauty. 

SPRING 

I can wake him. If he has slept seven years 
he must be hungry. Nicky, Nicky, here's an 
apple. Take a bite. 

[A sweet smile hovers over the face of the 
Dwarf. He reaches out his hand in his 
sleep.] 

DWARF 

Did anyone say apples? Apples? One a 
penny, two a penny, hot — no — [hesitates]. Per- 
sonally I prefer them cold. Apples! 

[Falls asleep again.] 

5-2 



SNICKERTY NICK 
SPRING 

I have an idea. 

Trundle him in the wheelbarrow 
And dump him on the ground 

The way you dumped old Winter 
When you didn't want him round. 

CHORUS 

Trundle him in the wheelbarrow 

And dump him in the brook ! 
We dumped a fat man in last week- 
Mercy, how he shook ! 
His face was like a cranky stove 

When the fire all goes out, 
And you ought to see the fat man now, 

He isn't half so stout. 
For we dumped him in the water 

And he rolled and rolled and rolled, 
He was harder than a snowball, 
He was frozen icy cold ; 
53 



SNICKERTY NICK 

His double stomach broke off first 

And then his double chin — 
If the Dwarf can find them floating away, 

Perhaps he'll bring them in, 
Or else he'll hang them on himself 

And not be half so thin! 

SPRING 
[With a dandelion in her mouthy 

Trundle him in the wheelbarrow 
And dump him on the ground, 
The way you dumped me yesterday — 

And see what I found, 
A little picture of the sun 
With sunbeams all around. 

I'll stick it in his buttonhole! 
[She puts the dandelion in his buttonhole.^ 
Now you are a little dandy dude. 

CHORUS 

And we'll dump him on the ground ! 

54 



SNICKERTY NICK 

ALL 
[Rushing forward^ 

Let me do it. 
[They wheel him round. The wheelbarrow up- 
sets and the Dwarf rolls out, jumps up and 
rubs his eyes. Spring and the faeries dis- 
appear.'] 

DWARF 

Is it time to get up? I think I must have had 
a nap. I had a dream just now. What was it? 
Have I slept seven years? 
[Proudly] 

I must see if I am still as beautiful as I was. 

The Marquise of Magog loved me for my 

strange beauty. Beauty is a joy forever. 

[He takes a mirror from his coat and looks at 

himself. Glances over his shoulder to see 

if anyone could be looking into the mirror.] 

Extraordinary! This must be some mistake. 

Is this a face? Well, well, well! Personally I 

55 



SNICKERTY NICK 

think beauty is only skin deep, fit for women 
and peacocks. But what is this? A dandehon? 
I must have been picking flowers in my sleep. 

I love to sleep-walk in a dell, 
To gather flowers and whistle — 

But O, I woke up with a yell 
The night I picked a thistle. 

I dreamed I kissed a little girl 

As pretty as .my sister — 
But O, she had long finger-nails 

And scratched me when I kissed her. 

Some people are like thistle-tops; 

They beckon and divert you. 
And look at you with friendly looks 

And smile at you — and hurt you. 

[The garden being now full of floivers, little 

children peep through the gate and call, 

pelting the Dwarf with blossoms. 

56 




•^ 25 "^-^^ 



Little children peep through the gate 



SNICKERTY NICK 
CHILDREN 

Nicky, Nicky, will the Giant come back soon? 
May we come in? 

DWARF 

[Delighted] 

Come in, come in! But the Giant will be 
home soon and he will eat you up if he catches 
you. 

[Points to the sign.] 

FIRST CHILD 

Will the Giant come to-day? 

DWARF 

The Giant said he would be away seven years. 
[Looking at his large dangling watch] 

It's seven years to-day. He has gone to see the 

Cornish Ogre. After the seven years are over 

he will have said all that he has to say, for his 

conversation is limited. 

57 



SNICKERTY NICK 
SECOND CHILD 

He is a selfish old Giant and he doesn't like us. 
There aren't any flowers when he's here. 

THIRD CHILD 
[Who is timid] 

He won't let anyone play in his garden. I'm 
scared. I want to go home. 

FIRST CHILD 

We like it here and we can run when we hear 
him coming. 

FOURTH CHILD 

It is better than playing on the hard road. The 
road is full of cobble-stones. 

DWARF 

Quite true, quite true. Cobble-stones gather 
no moss. 

SECOND CHILD 

It's such a nice garden. 

58 



SNICKERTY NICK 

DWARF 
Yes, geometrically it is very fine. Geometry 
is very interesting— to those who love it. Some 
people prefer the encyclopedia. Too many 
facts, however, stunt the imagination. Person- 
ally I prefer poetry. 

THIRD CHILD 

\_Timidly^ 
If he comes back to-day, will he eat us up? 

DWARF 

He may not come until to-morrow. But if he 
does come to-day he will gobble you up. 
Fee, fi, fo,fum, 

He'll smell the blood of little Tom Thumb, 
And yours and yours, and up he'll come 
And stuff you all in his great big tum! 
Fee, fi, fo, fum ! 
[Third child looks frightened and hides behind 
one of the others.'] 

59 



SNICKERTY NICK 
FOURTH CHILD 

Aren't you afraid he will eat you up? 

DWARF 

No, I am very old and tough. He won't eat 
me. 

THIRD CHILD 

Let's go away. 

FIRST CHILD 

No, I want to stay and pick some flowers. 

THIRD CHILD 

You'd better not, the Giant won't like it. 

FIRST CHILD 

Well, let's have a dance, then. 

DWARF 

All right. Dancing is quite the vogue now. 

I am thinking of taking it up myself. 

60 



SNICKERTY NICK 

[Js he takes a few steps, his whisk broom falls 
on floor.'] 
Dear me, it came off. 
Button, button, who's got the button? 
You got the botton? You got the button? 
[To a child in the audience.'] 
I see a little girl and she has a little nose 

Right in the middle of her face; 
But the nose is gone where a good nose goes— 

My button's in its place. 
O, I've lost my button, alas, alack I 
Little girl, little girl, please give it back! 
Button, button, she's got the button 

And will not give it back! 
Button, button, she's got the button- 
Somebody give me a tack ! 
[He tacks the whisk broom in place.] 
Whackity, whackity, whack! 

CHILDREN 

Whackity— whackity— whack ! 

6i 



SNICKERTY NICK 
FIRST CHILD 

Let's play house. 

SECOND CHILD 

No, we played house yesterday, and Tommy 
played the mother. But it wasn't any fun, for 
Tommy hasn't any imagination. He doesn't 
know how to be a mother. 

FOURTH CHILD 

Let's play Puss in the Corner. Who'll be 
puss? Nicky, will you? 

CHILDREN 

Puss, puss, puss 

DWARF 

No, I am too busy. 

62 




"Let's play" 



SNICKERTY NICK 

[ The Little Boy runs in laughing. The children 
gather around him and draw him into the 
center.^ 

LITTLE BOY 

Isn't the Giant's garden a lovely garden to 
play in? 

FIRST CHILD 

Will you be puss? 

LITTLE BOY 

Yes, I'll be puss. 
\^The giant is heard in the distance.~\ 

CHILDREN 

The Giant ! The Giant ! The Giant is com- 
ing; he'll gobble us up. 

GIANT 

Who is in my garden? My own garden is 
my own garden. I will allow nobody to play in 
it but myself. 

63 



SNICKERTY NICK 
CHILDREN 

Nicky,- Nicky, where shall we hide? If the 
Giant comes in the front gate he'll catch us. 

DWARF 

The Giant always comes in the back gate. 
Run, run. 

{^Tlic c/iildrefi run toivard the big front gate but 
they cannot open //.] 

CHILDREN 

The gate won't open, Nicky. He'll catch us, 
he'll catch us. 

GIANT 

[Heard coining nearer and nearer.^ 

Who is in my garden? I am the Baron Bill- 

Arron Bomberrum. My own garden is my own 

garden, and I will allow nobody to play in it but 

myself. 

64 



SNICKERTY NICK 

[ The children tug frantically at the gate but they 
cannot open it. They hide behind the 
bushes. The Giant appears with a huge 
stick. The Dwarf steals quickly toward the 
gate and opens it. The children finding the 
gate open rush toward it. The Giant chases 
them with his stick. The little boy is left, 
whom the Giant does not see.^ 

GIANT 

[Looking around astonished] 

What has happened. Flowers in my garden? 
The Cornish Ogre said the flowers never 
bloomed in his garden and they never would in 
mine. 

[Discovers the little boy lying under the trees, 
where he has been knocked down by the 
children in their flight.] 

LITTLE BOY 

[Holding up his hands] 

65 



SNICKERTY NICK 

O, Mr. Giant, help me up. I have hurt my- 
self. 

[77/e Giant looks at the child and puts the stick 
down, then lifts him up; and the little boy 
throws his arfns around the Giant's neck 
and kisses him.^ 

LITTLE BOY 

Thank you, Mr. Giant. 

GIANT 

[Reflectively^ 

No one ever kissed me before. It feels queer. 
[Giant puts him down.^ 

LITTLE BOY 

I'm all right now. 

[Takes the Giant's hand and looks up into his 
face.] 
I think I will run and play with the children 

now. Good-bye, Mr. Giant. 

66 



SNICKERTY NICK 

GIANT 
Don't you want a flower? You may have one. 
I'll pick one for you. Here it is. 

LITTLE BOY 

Thank you, good Mr. Giant. 

GIANT 

[Gradually relenting^ 

Here is another, you may have this. [Aside'] 
No one ever called me "Good Mr. Giant" before. 
[Looks at the little boy ivith a smile.'] 

LITTLE BOY 

Lean down and I will put one in your button- 
hole and one in mine. 

GIANT 

Aren't you a little chap? 

LITTLE BOY 

Aren't you a big chap? Little chaps like me 

like big chaps like you. 

67 



SNICKERTY NICK 

GIANT 

How would you like to have me give you all 
my flowers? 

LITTLE BOY 

O, I don't want all your flowers. Just some 
of them. 

GIANT 

How would you like to have me give you my 
kingdom and come and live here? 

DWARF 

[fFho has been watching closely^ 

Now see here, Baron Bill-Arron Bomberrum, 
throwing bouquets is all very well — but king- 
doms 

LITTLE BOY 

I couldn't stay here without the other children. 

GIANT 

No, I don't want the other children. But I 

68 



SNICKERTY NICK 

will let you come here and play in my garden 
whenever you want to. You can always come. 

LITTLE BOY 

No, I couldn't do that. I must go now and 
play with them. Thank you for the flowers. 
[Kisses the Giant.'\ 

GL\NT 

No one ever kissed me before, little chap. 

DWARF 

Aren't you going to kiss Nicky, too? 
[Little Boy kisses Dwarf .^ 

LITTLE BOY 

Good-bye, Nicky. Good-bye, Giant. 

[The little boy runs out of the gate waving his 
h/jnd to the Giant.'\ 

DWARF 

A boy named Jack, so I've heard tell, 

Killed a giant dead. 
69 



SNICKERTY NICK 

Mightn't he have done as well 
By loving him instead? 

Now here's a boy who saves the day, 
With swords? — no, no, with kisses. 

And really there's no other way 
One half so good as this is. 

For killing merely makes you blue 

And very cross and snappy, 
While loving makes not only you 

But everybody happy. 

And kissing giants is such fun. 
They think you're going to bite, 

But as soon as you give 'em another one, 
Everything's all right. 

GIANT 

Snickerty Nick, how did the children come 

here? Did you take down the sign? 

70 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

Yes, I had to. You see the flowers didn't like 
the notice. The only people who liked it were 
Winter and his Gnomes. They thought I was 
asleep, but I heard Winter tell Northwind why 
Spring had forgotten this garden. 

GIANT 
[Stands thinking. '\ 
Nicky, go and tell that little boy if he will come 
back I will give him my kingdom. 

DWARF 

What part do I get after all those kicks? 
Well, well, "uneasy lies the head that wears a 
crown." Personally I enjoy the simple life, like 
the colored man. Don't you know his song? 

GIANT 

No, I haven't heard it. 

DWARF 

I'm a-buildin' my house 
On a mountain so high, 
71 



SNICKERTY NICK 

A good place to wait 
For my love to come by. 

Go 'way now, all of you, 

Leave me alone 
On the peacefiillest mountain-top 

Ever was known. 

Go on a-scrimmagin' 

All over town 
For a stove-pipe hat 

And a purple silk gown. 

But leave me my cabin 

High up as the moon, 
Here where my true love 

Will come to me soon. 

GIANT 

Stop your noise, Nicky. Go and find the Httle 
boy and bring him back to me. 



72 




'What part do I get after all those kicks?" 



SNICKERTY NICK 

DWARF 
Can't be done. 

GIANT 

Not if I give him all my kingdom? 

DWARF 

No, he doesn't want your kingdom. 

GIANT 

What makes you think that? 

DWARF 

I don't think, I just know some things like 
women. Besides, you heard what he said. He 
wouldn't come without the other children. 

GIANT 

Is that why Spring wouldn't come here, I won- 
der? 

73 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

It's awfully funny and yet it's true 

When the children came the flowers came too. 

GIANT 

Go and find him and tell him all the children 
can come back and play with him. 

DWARF 

With me, too. Don't forget, Nicky. 

■ GIANT 
[ Taking up the signJ\ 
Nicky, I'm going to burn this sign up. 

DWARF 

[Pulling it away from Giant.'\ 
No, no. Give it to me. I can fix it so that 
when they see it, they'll come back. 
[Dwarf takes the brush and paints letters around 
the ETT on the sign making it read PETTED J\ 

74 



SNICKERTY NICK 

How do you like that? "Trespassers will be 
petted." 

[Fiews his work ivith his head first on one side 
and then on the other.'] 

GIANT 

Here, take these keys of my kingdom and un- 
lock every gate— so that we can all have the king- 
dom. But first go and find the little boy. 

DWARF 

Hurrah! 

Children, come back and be petted 

And bring all the others, 

Your sisters and brothers. 

No trespassers now will be etted. 

\_Exit Dwarf by the gate.] 

[The Little Boy appears, climbing over the 
wall.] 

7S 



SNICKERTY NICK 
LITTLE BOY 

Oh, I am glad you have changed that old sign. 

GIANT 
[Lifting the Little Boy into the garden.^ 
And I'm glad you have come back, little chap. 

[Little children are seen peeping through the 
gate.] 

LITTLE BOY 

Show 'em the new sign. Show 'em the new 
sign, good Mr. Giant. 

[The Giant holds the new sign up.] 

LITTLE BOY 

Come in ! Come in ! He says you may. 

CHILDREN 

Hurray! Hurray! 
Come in and play, 

For the Giant is back and he says you may ! 

76 




"Dipsey, ipsey, tiddley ipsey" 



SNICKERTY NICK 

[They join hands and dance round the Giant.] 

Dipsey-wipsey, 
Tiddledy ipsey, 
Snickerty says we may! 

DWARF 

[Running in with the jingling keys and skip- 
ping round the outside of the circle and 
joining in the chorus which they repeat.] 

Hurray! Hurray! 
Hurray! Hurray! 
Dipsey-wipsey, 
Tiddledy ipsey, 
Snickerty says we may. 

CURTAIN 

[The Dwarf puts his head out between the cur- 
tains and smiles. Then he comes through 
and holds up a bunch of golden keys.] 

77 



SNICKERTY NICK 
DWARF 

Now ladies and gentlemen, here are the keys, 
I beg you to do me this courtesy, please : — 
Unlock every door, every gate with these, keys, 
Every gate, every door in the kingdom ! 
And then I shall ask one more favour of you ! 
Please hand the keys on just as soon as you're 

through 
To whoever you see in a kingdom ! 
To unlock every garden and make them all free 
One garden for children and giants — and me — 
Oh, open your hearts, make them ample and 

free — 
For that is the key to the kingdom ! 

\_The Dwarf throws the golden keys to the chil- 
dren in the audience.^ 

THE END 



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